The Linux Kernel is Bloated and Sad

I had a good day.":O}

Yet we so often learn more from the bad days...Life truly is stranger than strange can say.

"Life is not only stranger than we imagine, Life is stranger than we can imagine".
(Arthur C. Clark)

If we can learn as much or more from the bad days why are the good days good?

Looking back my good days seem to have this in common:
Total absorption in the moment. I loved Martial arts, I loved Welding, I love writing these posts.

Oddly, when I get closest to being here now, I lose myself!!
To be here now is to not only to be here, but tobe me, being brought here by my presence in the now.

This whole now thing...we usually see it as bracketed by past and future. one of three possible time frames.
But upon examination there is no such thing outside of our imaginations.

We think past and we think future,But we gain experience in the now., by living life, Yet living and breathing teaches us little. We open to the now by reflecting upon life. By joining the moment with a mind that Asks to be included Asks to be and to be a part of what is to be.

This reflection expresses our spiritual connection to the now in the now. When we let go past, future, the Now expands to encompass all the time that is. All the time this is, is now. All the "You" that was, is or will ever be is was and will ever be found only in the now.

The now is "the when" in which we can act and be free of the past, be free of our hopes and fears of the future.

The more time one spends in the now without an agenda, without a plan or the hope of a plan the more the equality of all things emerges from our preferences and desires. We begin to understand the coming to be and passing away of all things. For they come and go and return again in the Now.

Now is a Holy domain. Past and future are the constructs of man. Now is the breaking wave of creation
leaving and returning again in great tides to the mind of God.

At least this is what whispers my soul when I awaken to the now.

Not only are they not, they are cruel in their are notness! LOL

'The heart thinks constantly, this can not be changed.

But a man should confine his thoughts to the immediate situation. All thoughts that go beyond the immediate situation only serve to make the heart sore."
I Ching

"Now Now Now"

When that becomes a sword you wield to vanquish miscreant thoughts that drag you from the moment in which you can act... You will be invincible and indivisible within your self.

You will become untiring as you will carry no baggage and entertain no separation between your self and Now.

This you can accomplish just by being you and allowing, permitting, yourself to be presented before the now.

To stand upright before the Now is to enter into the Now. The now gives us shelter from separate agendas
hidden within ourselves.
Cling to that which alone can sustain you. That which has always sustained us all.

Creation is not over. The great maker has not set aside his tools nor yet accomplished his divine objectives.

The Now is the breaking wave of his creation.The youngest moment, the latest thought to leave gods mind, and find an eternal echo throughout all of nature. Your nature and mine.this is the Now.

In virtue we are created, in the now we can express and rejoice in that creation.

"The situation is indeed not easy, But perfectly clear."

To turn upon a lifetime of opposition from within. To at last take to the field of battle.
To master oneself. To Learn and teach love. To reach within oneself and find what is divine is already at work in you.

All these may become active only in the kingdom of Now.
Right now is our ticket to the Eternal. Only in the now can we ever give or receive.

What leaves the now comes to nothing for all that is is now.

The Now is our inheritance. The Now is what we bequeath to our children.. The dust of our past and God's loftiest dreams of completion swirl in the now.

To be fully present and shed our fears we must petition the Now.

Here's how.

Plant your feet on the very the edge of life's great precipice, the mountain of doubt that towers over our budding faith.
Then leap for all you are worth
Leave behind all you think you know and ask Now, straight from the heart
for directions home..then follow, follow.

Do this Now, always.
:O}

I once, some time ago, asked The I-Ching if the Davine was going to save the world from man, for man.
I was told that things were going to get very hard for us all. But that Davine will not abandon what has been ordained.

But make no mistake, we will suffer great losses. We will pay for the harm we've done.
It would be wise to remember that we are not the only creature in creation, nor the only creature creation cares about.

There will be consequence beyond our imagining, but yes in time this to shall pass...just not in our time nor the time of our great great grand children...at best.

Mankind will learn what it is to be found wanting in his compassion for his world.

Those who come after us will be humanities greatest heroes or they will not be for very long.

the now always is. always changing, evolving, maturing and then passing away. Now is always arriving and the now is always passing away. Think ten million creatures being born every day.

Think Ten million creatures dying everyday They both share the same now, but experience it depending upon where they are in their life cycle both are happing now.

This happens according to fixed laws. These laws are the unchanging within change.

These laws determine what is be manifested in the now. How and when. The now is eternal and present always without interruption,

"Gods Eye"

The field of action upon which mortals such as we act out the drama of our lives

They are not laws that are external to things. But are inherent in them.

They don't fence us in or out! These law governed the way you developed in the womb! Yes they limit! In the way a baby can only be considered healthy if it is able to follow the normal course of development. Because that course literally creates the baby. Whole and complete. If any stages are skipped in its development, Any of the laws that govern it's development broken disaster often results.

In telling you this I speak linearly. But to understand, to see for yourself you must have an analog experience of now though contemplation. Hence the Judgments and the Images.


2 kinds of understanding, both elusive

Linear thought That indeed requires a past and future, an order of occurrence to function. Think of it as digital.

and

direct perception of what is before thought, think of it as analog.
Linear is great for sharing an understanding between men.

But everything real happens in analog. Then we think about it in digital. In words.
We derive meaning from our experience but in doing so limit that experience to the meaning we derive.

To simply be in the moment opens us to the meaning inherent in the moment. A meaning we did not create, but only perceive. As snow means that winter is here.

Then there is the meaning growing out of events. It is snowing, I'd better get home while I can.
None of this requires though that goes beyond our immediate situation. None of this requires linear thinking.

(Every animal seeks it's den in bad weather, they do so without reasoning. But their intelligence in action is plain to see.

We perceive a thing before we think about it. We may perceive a thing more completely if we remain in analog and remain in the moment with that thing.
Without imposing our opinions, thoughts, desires upon the moment we are sharing now with whatever is being expressed by the now.


Socialization Leaves us, most of us stuck in digital mode. We stop seeing what cannot be talked about. We stop having a direct unfiltered experience of our selfs and our world.

How ever discipled and untiring we make our selfs in linear thought, we remain cut off from our own experience of this life.We often borrow the experience of others trying to make them our own. More demon folly more externally imposed understandings of the world, rather mis-understandings as they are not our own!!

Doctors can no longer relate to being healers. They chop us up into parts affected and parts unaffected and sicken the nation with their heartless cures.
Everywhere you look people are on long term vacation from themselves. They no longer know what they feel under all the anger and fear.

Because we don't experience directly straight from the heart, but without emotionality.

We become, grow to be, uprooted from the reality that needs no explanation.

Not being grounded by direct experience we grow fearful, we sense that our path isn't really alive within us but rather lays out dead before us. Or dying from our neglect.

We commutate it in digital. See the problem?

Talking about direct experience in the language of the linear a digitize reproduction whose very presence annihilates analog!

We can have one AND the other Just not both at once.
Both at once means we lost our grasp upon both! Sloppy linear thought and inattention in the moment go hand and hand.

There is order in life. Life GROWS!! Amazing! We often try to impose our own order upon life. To plant and to harvest we need not do this. Life will tell when to plant, when to harvest

There is a past and there will be a future. We will hardly recognize them as they came and will come masquerading as the now!

If we want to talk the past or future we have to do it in the now.

difficult for me to try to explain one in terms of the other as I do not yet have a complete insight on the one hand nor a complete reasoned understanding on the other.

We are looking at two completely different ways of seeing the world.
(Just like in Physics!)

Relativity works to predict some occurrences and Quantum can predict other occurrences. If I have that right, Which you should question! LOL

in a song by Bruce Cockburn...(What a name to carry into wedlock!":O}

"We are passing through the Iris of the world"

.Like an eye passing over an unknown page in a book. The book is written word by word as our eye reaches it. Only when the words are assembled in our minds does the story unfold in our understanding.
God's famous "Eye" is the now. We are passing though the iris because we are coming to be and passing away in the eye that sees all, in the now.

Man this is sloppy writing! LOL
So...be here now to grasp and viscerally understand.
Go Digital to communicate what can not be communicated. "O}

See why science has such a hard time with assigning meaning and sages struggle to build a decent bridge? "

But you didn't ask me how to build a bridge. You like most everyone else want to know how to live with yourself in peace right?

So I nailed your foot to the now. Try to leave and you fall down and go boom!
Remove the nail and you drift off into the boundless and dissipation. You now have no choice, stand and face your demon that stands between you and you/now.

Face the thoughts you internalized as a child or the child in you internalize yesterday when you were off Thinking about stuff that can only bring you sadness.

To be quite is a pleasure we've mostly forgotten. The demon of external validation is a creature of Linear thought. And so tries to prevent us from "coming round right."
Asking stupid questions of us to pry us away from the moment.

Questions like "Am I doing it right?"
Like you could do it wrong!?

"Am I making progress?"
Like there was ever any where to go but you/now.

Will they know me in heaven?
Hows that any of your damn business now?

"I'm missing my favorite tv show."
Go watch it. But remain with yourself in the you/now.

Simple, but indeed not easy we love making problems for ourselves!

More time spent in the now fewer problems to prevent you, a smaller demon to resent you, for demons cannot enter the now. They just talk us half to death if we listen.
entering the now scrapes them right off your back. For they are but broken and twisted thought drifting without root seeking to harm who so ever they may.

Why do they pursue us. They steal intention from us when we are inattentive. They seek what they can never have, place at the table. A place in the now.

I really don't know if they posses personalities or intentions or just arise as a logical consequence of abandoning what is ordained for man. To be present in and of the moment.

Either way this demon has crushed the spirit of many. For he demands we please this world of lies or think less of ourselves.

We must be away from ourselves and away from the now to even hear this voice.

Upon entering the now we leave all evil behind haunting the linear.

I see these things I wright as "Refections upon things at hand"
(A Chinese Classic)
As meditations upon the moment I'm in.

I sympathize! I've tried to keep the train on the tracks But must follow my muse as well!
I tried to clean things up a bit and to clarify what I saw the need to. Please ask about anything you find more than usually cryptic.":O}

"If there are any heavens
My mother will
all by her self have one......

....Suddenly in the sunlight my father will bow
and the whole garden shall bow.
ee cummings

I have the same take on him...but you never know! ":O}

I just couldn't leave Mr Cummings Near perfect song In such poor representation. Cummings was the first poet I tackled on my own without help from academia. This will explain my many blind sports, also my great love of his work. So in order to honor my debt I reproduce it below

. I paid a dollar in a used book store for his complete works. around 1968

I believe This world has forgotten how to value such men. Or perhaps his work is like my own, only for the few. Hey he made a dollar off me...Better than I've ever done!
I fully understand around 30 or 40 of the hundreds. They were written between 1923 and 1954 So we briefly shared this world in time. But many references are lost to me. Mr Cummings was one of the first great lovers of mankind that I was to encounter.

XLIII

if there are any heavens my mother will (all by herself) have
one. It will not be a pansy heaven nor
a fragile heaven of Lilies of the valley but
it will be a heaven of Blackred roses

my father will be (deep like a rose
tall as a rose)

standing near my

(swaying over her
silent)
with eyes which are really petals and see

nothing with the face of a poet really which
is a flower and not a face with
hands
which whisper
"This is my beloved my

(suddenly in the sunlight
he will bow

& the whole garden will bow)

For personal reasons this will alway speak to me of first love and my first loss of many.
For me it is the Romeo and Juliet of poems.":O}

LVII
somewhere i have never traveled.gladly beyond
any experience,your eyes have their silence:
in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me.
or which i cannot touch because they are to near.

your slightest look easily will unclose me
though i have closed myself as fingers,
you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens
(touching skilfully, mysteriously ) her first rose

or if you wish to close me.i and
my life shut very beautifully ,suddenly,
as when the heart of this flower imagines
the snow carefully every where descending

nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals
the power of your intense fragility : whose texture
compels me with the color of it's countries.
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens, only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
nobody , not even the rain, has such small hands

Last one, promise!
This is what we called a F*** poem in School, but it elevates carnal love and uses it to connect to what divinity we may possess. It's titled

Oh Thou to whom the musical white spring

offers her lily inextinguishable
taught by thy tremulous grace bravely to fling

Implacable death's mysteriously sable
robe from her redolent shoulders,
Thou from whose
feet reincarnate song suddenly leaping
flameflung , mounts, inimitably to lose
herself where the wet starts are keeping

their exquisite dreams--OH Love! upon thy dim
shrine of intangible commemoration
(from whose faint close as some grave languorous hymn

pledged to illimitable dissipation
unhurried clouds of incense fleetly roll)
i spill my bright incalculable soul

Another promised last one! ":O}

You MUST read this aloud around ten times without pause.
It will take you to a better place.":O


these children singing in stone a
silence of stone these
little children wound with stone
flowers opening for

ever these silently lit
tle children are petals
their song is a flower of
always their flowers

of stone are
silently singing
a song more silent
than silence these always

children forever
singing wreathed with singing
blossoms children of
stone with blossoming

eyes
know if a
lit tle
tree listens

forever to always children singing forever
a song made
of silent as stone silence of
song