After doing a couple weeks with some rather intense pain, finally broke down and let the Doc give me some meds. Also did another scan and the cancer has vigorously exploded. After some honest jawboning and just a little arm twisting, Doc finally gave me his best educated time frame. Seems I have about 2-6 weeks. The upside is, his other best educated guess is I should step from this mortal coil quietly in ma sleep. Really wanted to be around to see that orange assbag hauled from the WhiteHouse
We always knew this day would come. That it would be a fierce and desperate fight leading to surrender. It is just the way we were made.We are never ready to say good by. I am not ready to say good bye to you. So I won't. What I am more than ready to say is this. You have met your fate with dignity and courage. With each set back you found another way forward another way to continue the fight. It was from you that I took the strength to endure your fate.To see a good man fading from this plane of existence. We are few and we are getting fewer all the time. This is the true point of departure as we move into that "undiscovered country." I do harbor the hope of meeting you there. You will have to take me fishing when I show up unannounced. You will have to take my hand and calm my fears. We both know people who have already made that journey. They will take you fishing and calm your fears. Please know that I am distressed and will greatly miss you. But no sorrow can keep us from going where we need to be to complete our journey. When my time comes I will call upon you and your great spirit to help me Step from this world into the next. Please continue to speak to us for as long as you may have. But if this is to be your last post... I'll just say Fair thee well please do enjoy your coming immortality. Go a head and bait our hooks I cannot be all that much longer here my self.
Well...there is an upside to this. Tomorrow my son and his mom are driving down from Chicago to visit one last time. I told'em not to, with covid 19 and all....but, I was basically told to perform a certain sexual act upon myself that I'm pretty sure ain't possible.
I love seeing your posts Luta Wicasa. I wish you could post here forever, and wish that you didn't have to say good bye. I didn't realize that the C-word was becoming stronger and you had to handle that. Thank you for being such a valuable Member! When the marmalade vicious fool is finally dethroned you may hear the relief all the way to heaven.
As time is short, please forgive me If I dare to much. in seeking a good end. Death is not a place or a thing. Yet it has one small continuous contribution in every life. Death is but the space between the words we write. Death is in each breath. and between each tick of the clock. Death is not a punctuation mark. It places no emphasis Death says nothing, death has nothing to say. Death is the pause. Inhale, pause, exhale. Death in each heart beat pause beat. Death arises in between each moment pause moment without the pause there could be no next moment, only a static same moment forever. Without the next moment there could be no development In killing the moment it creates space in time for the next moment. Can you see this? If my foot fall did not die I could not walk or make progress of any kind. This holds true for both our material bodies and our spiritual bodies. They both progress though countless deaths to achieve the fullness of life. We need no explanation as the why out physical bodies are here. They are a part of the vastness of nature. But we are here in spirit as well. In the eternal and everlasting by definition there can be no time, no death. No progress. So how then are our souls to ever grow? And so the great wheel of life begins her spin into differentiation. That which is unchanging (law) has no physical form. Yet it regulates the changeable. To what end? I certainly do not know the mind of God.":O} But If I was in charge of the unchangeable and wanted to see beautiful souls I created grow beyond what I had created, I might try sending them into time and changes in time,space, to allow what has no form to grow. I might put a pause in between the tick and the tock to create choice in each and every second. I might create death to enable life in each and every moment. Yet every thing on this plane of existence wares out.exhausts it's potential. falls prey to it's own mortality. Mortality pause mortality. Until each of my beautiful shining souls achieves it's proper place in eternity Which would be Mortality pause immortality. How sure of any this am I? Very sure. incarnation is the vehicle of the souls growth. We could never have grown an inch in heaven. Heaven is eternal and unchanging, no progress or regression is possible. Heaven is indeed perfect. Once perfection is achieved there is nothing left to do!! But what if I wished to bring more less exalted souls into heaven and to elevate them? Then I must give what is spiritual a form that the spiritual can gain expression in. Bodies created choice, choice creates love, freedom and progress. Bodies wear out. Body death body pause body.death eternity. " And Death Shall Have No Dominion by Dylan Thomas And death shall have no dominion. Dead men naked they shall be one With the man in the wind and the west moon; When their bones are picked clean and the clean bones gone, They shall have stars at elbow and foot; Though they go mad they shall be sane, Though they sink through the sea they shall rise again; Though lovers be lost love shall not; And death shall have no dominion. And death shall have no dominion. Under the windings of the sea They lying long shall not die windily; Twisting on racks when sinews give way, Strapped to a wheel, yet they shall not break; Faith in their hands shall snap in two, And the unicorn evils run them through; Split all ends up they shan't crack; And death shall have no dominion. And death shall have no dominion. No more may gulls cry at their ears Or waves break loud on the seashores; Where blew a flower may a flower no more Lift its head to the blows of the rain; Though they be mad and dead as nails, Heads of the characters hammer through daisies; Break in the sun till the sun breaks down, And death shall have no dominion.
Friday and Saturday were wonderful days. Ex-wife, Son and Daughter In-Law made it down safely, spent both days all together...lots'o stories and laughter.
I'm glad that family visited you and you enjoyed the time you had together. I read that we never lose our mothers and fathers, as imperfect as they were we all get better with time.
